I think people fear hitting 40 because a major influence is the friends and family around them making it sound like that’s it. Downhill as they say ….. That’s the wrong attitude but most listen to it and take it in mentally. Sometimes friends and family don’t know what’s best, yet they are full of useless information that brings you down. This isn’t a self help tip, it’s clear these people haven’t a clue what they are saying. They also don’t have the cop on that it can hurt people that can’t block that attitude. People are idiots sometimes! Hurtful ones
Why do they do this? Simple truth is that they settled in life. Happy to stay in the right zone! The Zone of be like everyone else! That Zone they need you to be in, to never stand out and be different. They don’t like a positive influence because it will show them the truth and regrets in life.
In two days I’ll turn 40. Does it make any difference to me, No! To me it’s relief that throughout my twenties and thirties I made tons of mistakes. Big ones, hard ones, heartbreaking ones. Major highs of victory but the other side absolute destroying feelings of loss in my career. Going through many possible career ending injuries and finding other ways to return to fighting. 40 years of hard work and finding a new person inside me. Every Birthday I look in the mirror and see another change in myself.
I don’t have kids but I’ve never felt a need to have them to make me happy. I try to find ways every day to achieve that. Challenge and reaching goals is a great feeling!
Right now I’ve 125 Pankration killers from 4-13. I get to see them every day. I know when my kids are having good days and bad ones. Many a day I’ve pulled a child into the office and we work out why they are feeling bad.
I often can tell them a story of my childhood which may relate, make them understand feelings or just laugh about the situation they are going through. Let them know they are doing good in life. I feel 100 percent I’m a mom to them just with a different set of tools to help them through it all. Now, if only I could claim benefits for them all… I’d be on holidays forever .. ha
The last few years of course mum being sick with cancer has really showed me never to get caught up in how people feel about me and my actions on a day to day basis. I’ve learnt to move on very quickly, if someone lets me down a friend. I don’t let myself get upset, I deal with the emotion in a clear manner.
I say to myself they will never change how they think of me. Why should I spend time being upset about that. It’s an absolute waste of time and energy that I need to put into other areas. It also brings stress, that’s the No1 way to cause sickness. I say no thank you to that!
People really need to get with this type of attitude. I won’t lie and tell you I have it perfect either. I’m coming off another tough loss in my career at KSW.
Maybe a really bad mistake on my part to move up a weight and on short notice. What can I say except people have no idea how hard it is for me to even get fights at Atomweight in Europe. So I risked a move up, now I learn again and go again. Challenge remember it’s true happiness.
I messed up and I’ve got to deal with it. I’m upset about the loss for different reasons, it’s just I hate letting my coaches and my pankration students down. Those I never want to let down, that breaks me a little inside when I lose but it never stops me going back to the gym to teach them. I know a play a huge part in how they become bulletproof in life. I am a guide to them.
40 is an interesting time now, I’ve made the mistakes and I’ve learnt from them. I nearly lost my mum and dealt with that possibility. I’ve changed completely who I am from the girl that had long hair to short. I changed my life, I took control of it! It may have upset others along the way but looking forward I’ve no regrets. I do wish I got more fights but the injuries affected that. I think every fight educated me as well and that is why I still want more. As I’ve always said fighting is the scariest thing a person can do in life but the most honest of character.
Whatever age you are, you must never fear being different or not liked. You should be happy in life, that’s one hundred percent your right. Life is damn tough, it doesn’t matter what age you are, it’s how each day you go for it! You just have to say Fuck It!
I’m saying that every time someone says that stupid comment about getting over 40 and to old to fight. If they think I’m getting old they should just come into the gym and find out in the octagon! People often talk but don’t back it up. That’s why I never go to pubs, tons of those people in them. They have nothing in life just a big mouth to use in drinking. Lazy for Life
Last thing Alphaforce I ask you all to be kind to others and animals we have to much hate in this World.
I’ll leave you with this awesome piece from my mental coach Rob Dawson. Another who’s got me to 40 and still chasing the highs!